by Prophecy Girl
Angel woke up gay. He got up out of bed and went into the bathroom, just feeling the gayness coursing through his veins. He struck a pose, and looked at the photo of himself stuck to the mirror. Damn, he was sexy. If he weren't him, he'd surely hit on himself..
He put on his leather pants and shiny, sequined red long-sleeved shirt, and left his apartment. He strolled down the street in the moonlight, whistling "Dancing Queen" under his breath. He couldn't prevent from dancing his way into the library, where Faith was laying draped over the checkout desk.
"Hi there!" Angel said brightly, offering her a wide grin.
Faith grunted. "Yeah."
"Is Giles around?" he asked, retaining the smile and swinging himself up onto the counter.
Faith grunted again. "No."
"Aw, what's with the sour-puss?" Angel asked, cocking his head to one side and jutting his lower lip out.
"It's the whole evil-Watcher thing. It just sucks," she said, distraught. "She totally had me fooled!"
Angel offered her a cheerful grin. "Well, cheer up kiddo! I'm sure you'll get a new Watcher who's just fantastic! Let's just turn that frown upside down!"
Faith glared at him. He shrugged. "Fine, then be a pouty-frowny-face. I'll see you around!" He hopped off the counter and waved, then turned and practically skipped out the door, whistling, as gay as he could be.
Faith shook her head and continued her moping, too upset to even bother wondering what the hell was going on with Angel. "What a nut job.."
Angel was moseying down the street, heading for Giles' house, when he bumped into someone.
"Goodness me, I'm sorry!" he said, genuinely concerned.
The man he'd bumped into turned around. "Well, gee willakers. That's all right! Not many kids your age even bother to apologize these days."
Angel offered him yet another dazzling smile. "No hard feelings, then?"
Richard Wilkins nodded and held out his hand. "Not a-one!"
Angel took his hand and shook it, marveling at the feel of it. "Your hand is so soft!" he cried.
Wilkins blushed. "I moisturize."
"I can tell," Angel replied alluringly. "I think a man with soft hands is very sexy.."
Wilkins blinked. "Now, now, young man. I don't go in for that sort of shenanigans."
Angel pouted and laid his cheek against Wilkins' hand.
Just then, Buffy came walking by on patrol and saw them. She gasped. "Oh god, Angel!" she cried, startling both men.
"Is this a friend of yours?" Wilkins paused, looking concerned.
Angel blinked innocently. "Why so huffy, Buffy?" he giggled girlishly at his own joke. "Huffy Buffy."
"Angel! You're--" she struggled. She couldn't even say it. but it was true. Angel was..
"A vampire? Of course, I should have known," Wilkins said, thumping his forehead. "Silly me!"
"No! I mean, yes! But he's.. he's a.. clover boy!" she cried.
Wilkins glanced at Angel, Buffy, then back to Angel. Well now, one can't let an invitation like that fly by, he thought. That would be just plain rude. "You know, Angel.. I have some etchings in my home you might like to see."
Angel clenched his fists under his chin and squealed with delight. He followed after the Mayor, whistling the theme from 'The Facts of Life'.
Buffy gawked after them and blinked, considering this turn of events. Maybe Angel actually had the right idea.. And with that idle thought, she suddenly felt a surge of gayness go through her body. She blinked again and looked around. She, too, was gay now. She turned abruptly and began walking in the direction she had come from.
"I wonder if Faith is still at the library.."