Title: Endings and Beginnings Author: A. Price E-mail: amhumphry@netscape.net Rating: pg13? Summary: Buffy has amnesia, Spike takes advantage. Unexpected Plans He wasn't sure when it happened. It was hard to pinpoint the exact moment when watching her every move became the center of his universe. Spike watched Buffy as Giles gave her the low down on the latest ghoulie to invade Sunnydale. He was here to help because, well - he didn't like to think about his blackmailer, and it was moot now because he helped her out of want now. Of course she didn't realize that, not yet. She turned to him, "Ready for patrol, Spike?" Her hazel eyes shining, blond hair pulled up casually, small tendrils excaping around her pretty face. He just shook his head and got up moving towards the door. The watcher stood up saying the same words to her he said every single night "Be careful." "I always am." She smiled rolling her eyes at him. She lied, she wasn't always careful, she took chances nightly, that was part of what made her a good slayer. But it would also someday assure her early demise. Spike wasn't sure he could handle that now - or ever. The vamp in the cemetary seemed to come from nowhere, Buffy got to him first, he managed to backhand her swiftly, she landed against a large stone, unconcious, blood streaming from a wound on her forehead. The anger raged through Spike, before the vamp could lean down for the kill, he was upon him driving the stake deep into his heart. A pile of dust covered the ground. He knelt by Buffy putting her head in his lap, lightly fingering the wound on her head, she started stirring opening her large eyes she looked at him, confusion on her face. "You okay?" He asked her softly. She nodded her head, still staring at him confused. "Are you sure? You don't look so good." He asked her concern in his voice. Tears started forming in her eyes, she looked up at him, he saw fear in her face. She finally formed the words "Where am I?" "You're in the cemetary, Pet. Don't you remember?" He answered her, now he was confused. "No, I don't remember. I don't remember anything! Who am I?" She choked back a sob. "It's okay, it's okay, Anne." Spike blurted out. "Anne. My name is Anne?" She asked as she struggled to sit up. Spike shook his head vigorously. "Yes, you are Anne Pennington." She looked at him cautiously "Who are you?" "Well, Luv, I'm William - your husband." He answered, the lie came so easily he almost believed it himself. "Why are we here?" She asked as Spike helped her to her feet. "It's a long story, we have a lot to do before we leave town. I'll take you home and you can rest. While I run a few errands." "We're leaving town?" She asked him unsure. Buffy gave him a hesitant smile. For some reason, she felt she could trust him. He led her into his loft and put her in the master bedroom. She was tired and and a little shaky, she was soon sleeping peacefully.He couldn't help but think that she looked right lying there in his bed. He quiickly made a mental note of what he had to do. First stop was the cemetary. He went back to the pile of dust that had recently been a vampire, taking a lighter out on his pocket he lie it on the ground next to the dust. The intricate S mongrammed on the lighter shown brightly in the moonlight. It had been a gift from The Scooby Gang after Spike had played a major part in the death of a large demon. When they saw it, they would think the ashes were what was left of him. The blood on the tombstone form Buffy's head injury should be sufficient enough evidence that Spike and Buffy had met with foul play. It would take them a little while to figure out Buffy was alive, when no new slayer was called. But that would give him plenty of headstart. The second stop was Buffy's house. He climbed silently through her bedroom window. He found a bag and packed several ariticles of clothing in it. He also took her hairbrush and some toiletries from her dresser and the bathroom. Thirdly, he stopped at a drug store and picked up a few items that would come in handy. Arriving back at the loft, he found Buffy still sleeping. He checked her pulse and breathing, she seemed fine. He quietly lie the hairbrush on the dresser and put the toiletries in the bathroom like they belonged there. The clothes he left in the bag, they were afterall - leaving on a trip. He sat down by her on the bed, pushing a stray lock of hair from her forehead. She woke up, startled, looking around at her surroundings. She allowed herself a small smile when she looked up at Spike next to her on the bed. Spike looked down at her lovingly "Sleep well?" "I feel better. Still groggy on things though. All of my memory will come back, right William?" She asked fear in her voice. "I'm sure it will, Anne. Don't worry, and if it doesn't - we'll just have to make new wonderful ones!" He told her with a smile. She laughed softly. "Okay." She said in a small soft voice. She leaned up against him and he smiled to himself. This was the beginning - the beginning of William and Anne. *********************************************************************** Certain advantages "We need to get on the road, pet." Spike told Buffy as he stood up and went to find his bag. "William, I really need a bath before we go, okay?" Buffy asked hesitantly, she stood up slightly dizzy. Spike was at her side quickly, helping her into the bathroom. He led her to sit on the toilet seat while he ran bathwater for her. Adding the bubblebath he had brought from her home. He looked at the watch Buffy was wearing it was 10pm, Giles would not start worrying until midnight. That gave him two hours to get her out of town, and a few more hours of driving before daylight. "Okay, Love. You bathe and I'll finish packing." He told her as he turned to leave her the bathroom. "Would you please stay? I just feel all woozy and I'm scared." She said softly. "Of course, I'll stay." He told her smiling as she stood and started to undress, she noticed his look and turned from him shyly. Then as if she had thought about it she turned around "I'm sorry. We are married , I guess there is no reason to be shy." "No reason at all, Love." He told her while holding a nonbreath as he watched her fully undressed submerge herself under the bubbles. There were going to be certain advantages to this situation that in his haste he had not even thought about. "Tell me about me, please William." She asked as she settled herself in the tub. Spike thought a moment and then began to speak. "You are Anne Lenore Pennington. You are nineteen years old, we've been married six months. I'm sorry but your parents are dead and you were an only child. Unfortunately my family is also gone. So, we basically all we have is each other." Buffy looked at him intently "I'm nineteen and married? Seems kind of young." "We've been seeing each other for a couple of years - how can I explain it? We're very, very much in love." Spike told her convicingly as he bent over the tub and kissed her nose. She grinned up at him, playfully tossing a handfull of suds at him. "I'm glad to hear that part. I'll be okay now, if you want to go finish packing." "You sure?" He asked as he turned to leave. "Yeah, I'm sure. I get the feeling you'll take care of me." She answered shyly. "I will - you can count on it, pet." ****************************************************************************************** You're a what? After packing the car, Spike went back up to the loft to get Buffy. He was nervous when he didn't see her immediately. "Bu...Anne, Anne, I'm ready." He called out. "I'm in the kitchen, I'm kind of hungry. You know William, we really need to do some grocery shopping, all I can find is cocoa and marshmallows." Buffy looked at him and frowned. "Well, we knew we were leaving soon. I'll stop and get you something to eat on the way out." He offered her his hand. She nodded and took the offered hand. After settling in the car, Spike went to a drive thru window and ordered food for Buffy. "Aren't you going to eat?" She asked him over her burger and fries. "Not now. We need to talk, Anne." He wasn't sure when he should tell her about his eating habits. But she seemed to trust him, so he decided to take a chance, he was already risking everything with this plan he had put into motion tonight. She turned to him, she looked nervously at him then bent her head and studied the cup her milkshake was in. "Talk? About what?" "Anne, I love you and you love me. Please remember that when I tell you what I have to say, okay?" He told her gauging her reaction. She looked firghtened but softly said "Okay." "Now, I'm not sure of everything that you remember. But I'm not your ordinary guy, I'm a vampire." He spit it out quickly, his eyes leaving the road to look at her. She looked at him with large eyes "You're a what?" She asked incredulously. "I'm a vampire." He repeated. She smiled at him, the smile you give to the strange person talking to themselves in the checkout line at the grocery store. She scooted a little closer to the car door. "A vampire, really? And we are married, and you don't want to kill me and drink my blood?" "No, love. I mean, yes I am a vampire, but no I don't want to kill you and drink your blood. I love you more than anything in the world. I haven't tried to hurt you, right? And I wouldn't be telling you this, if I didn't care. Think about it." He said hoping she would believe him, and he had just realized the truth in his words - he did love her more than anything. Buffy thought for a long moment, mulling over what he had told her. < He hasn't tried to hurt me. Why would he make something like this up? I wish I could remember. All, I am sure of is that he won't hurt me, I just know it .> His hands gripped the steering wheel tighter, was she going to say something? Finally she turned to him. "Okay, you are a vampire, I can't remember a darn thing about my life, you seem to want to help, so I'm going to trust you on this. But if it wasn't a rule before , it is now - no biting!" She smiled a big smile at him and finshed her burger. Spike smiled back at her. < That was easier then I had imagined. Now, how do I talk her into dying her hair darker? > ********************************** An unknown gentlenss Spike was proud of himself, he was answering all of Buffy's questions about their past with wonderful answers. He was giving them a wonderful life. "So, where did we meet? How long did we go out before we got married?" She asked curiously. The fun thing was that he could actually add a bit of truth to the elaborate tale he was weaving. "Ah, we met at a club, I had not been in town long. I saw you dancing and just had to meet you." "Love at first sight?" "Not exactly, sweetheart. We went through some rough times, I thought we might kill each other, but it all worked out! And here we are." This was getting easier and easier he thought with a smile. "Here we are. By the way, where are we going?" She asked suddenly. Spike had to think a minute, he didn't know where they were going. Then it came to him, "Virginia, we are going to Virginia." < That should be far enough away, until he could get them out of the country completely. > "What do you do for work?" "Well, since you know what I am, I can tell you I travel around killing demons, bad vamps etc." It was the only thing he could think of and it had been true lately, anyway. "Does that kind of work pay our bills?" She asked with a small frown. "Anne, we have plenty of money, don't worry. I'm going to stop up ahead at this next hotel. It will be daylight soon and we both are tired after tonights adventure." Spike pulled into the parking lot of the hotel, leaving Buffy in the car, he went inside and got them a room. Buffy grabbed her bag and followed him in to the room. The room was small but nice. Buffy went to the bathroom and changed into a tee shirt that was in her bag. She stood in front of the mirror and brushed her hair out. Spike watched her from the bed, not sure what was going to happen next. "Tired?" He asked a gentleness in his voice. "Yes, I am. It's been a long night. Maybe I'll remember tomorrow." She sat down hesitantly on the bed beside him. "Maybe. Why don't you lie down and try to get some sleep." She crawled into the bed next to him and slid under the sheets. She was almost on the edge of the bed, Spike smiled and gently touched her shoulder. "It's okay, Anne. Remember, we have a no biting rule." He laughed softly. She turned over where she could see him and scooted a little bit closer. She giggled softly "See that you remember it!" She rolled over, her body spooning against his. "Goodnight, William." She whispered softly into the darkness. "Goodnight, Luv." He whispered back, placing one arm gently around her waist. They were both asleep within minutes. ******************************************************* A guy could get used to this. Spike woke first, he could tell the sun had gone down. He then noticed the blond head lying on his chest one arm stretched lazily across his stomach. He had to smile to himself. He could really get used to waking up like this. He looked down at Buffy sleeping peacefully. He didn't want to think about what would happen if she regained her memory, or maybe it would take awhile and even if she did regain her memory - she would want to stay Anne. It was wishful thinking on his part, but he wanted her safe and sound. Buffy stirred and opened her eyes, she quickly removed her head from his chest, obviously embarassed. "I'm sorry." She said softly as she sat up. "No need for apologies, Anne. We are married." This lie was getting way too easy to repeat. "Yeah, it's just that everything is so fuzzy." She smiled at him and got up to use the bathroom. She looked in the mirror telling her reflection, "You are Anne, Anne Pennington. William is your husband, you are very much in love." "What?" Called Spike from the other room. "Nothing, I'm going to run a bath. Then can we go eat? I'm starving." She told him as she turned on the water. "Whatever you like, pet." Spike answered rising from the bed and joining her in the bathroom. "Are you sure you're okay?" Buffy started to undress, a tear rolled down her cheek. Spike noticed and gently wiped it off with his fingertip. "What's wrong?" Buffy held her shirt up to her front and leaned against him. He hesitantly reached his arms around her bare back and pulled him to her. "You're being so nice to me and I can't even remember you. I'm sorry." She sobbed lightly. "It's okay, Luv. You can take all the time you need. It's going to be okay. I will always take care of you." He told her as he stroked her hair with one hand, still holding her tightly with the other. In a flash his lips found hers, gently he kissed her not pushing. He was surprised when she returned the kiss, even deepened it. She let her shirt fall and put arms around his neck, holding on as if her life depended on it. He pulled back, "Are you sure?" He asked hoarsely. "Uh huh. We are married, this should be completely natural, maybe it will even jog my memory." She giggled, turning off the water and leading back into the bedroom. Spike was going extrememly slow, almost hesitating before he touched her again. "Hey, it's okay. You're acting like we haven't done this before." She giggled again. "Just don't want to push you, Luv." He answered swallowing hard. "You aren't. You say we are very much in love. Prove it." She said slyly. "You don't have to ask me twice." He joined her on the bed and gently, lovingly showed her just how much he loved her. Buffy sighed contentedly. Spike smiled at her wrapped in his arms. "Still hungry, sweetheart?" "Famished." She laughed out loud. "Go finish your bath, and we'll eat." He told her watching her leave the bed sheet wrapped around her. < Cor, now what have I gone and done? > He knew he should feel some guilt over what he had done, but he had not felt this happy in years. And she was happy too, he could tell. William could make Anne very happy. ******************************************************************* She's Mine They made a pleasant journey to Virginia Beach, Virginia. Buffy still didn't remember alot, but she felt safe and secure with her William. He had convinced her to go brunette and he went with her, he would miss the golden blondness but he felt a little bit safer with her identity a little more hidden. They rented a sweet little cottage on the beach and settled in, it was furnished but they bought little items that made it seem like theirs. Buffy had spent the day on the beach and had come in at dusk, she was hauling out the trash, when Spike heard her laughing and a male voice. It had just turned dark so he went to join her in the backyard. She was talking to the neighbor over the fence. "Hey, Sweetheart." She said sweetly as he walked out the backdoor. He put his arm around her possesively. "This is our neighbor Justin." Justin smiled at him, "You must be the husband she told me about. You need to put a ring on her finger, so males know she's off limits." He told Spike good naturedly. Spike held back the impulse to jump over the fence and kill him right there. "Well, she's lost her ring. We need to get another I guess. As long as you know she's off limits." He said a touch of humor in his voice, but his eyes told Justin he was dead serious. Justin said his goodbyes and went back into his house. "Let's go out." Spike told Buffy as they went back inside. Spike drove to the first jewelry store he could fine. "Why are we here?" Buffy asked curiously. "Let's find you a ring." He told her with a smile. "You don't have to do this just because of what Justin said." She laughed softly. "I want you to have a wedding band. Please choose one." "Only if you get one, too." She said as she looked at the rings. "Okay, I'll get one, too." He agreed with a grin. They left the store with simple gold bands on their hands his engraved with her name inside and her's with his name. They went out to a nice restaurant and had a lovely dinner and a nice slow dance. Buffy kept looking at the ring on her finger and smiling, this in turn made Spike smile. He was sure he had done the right thing. Weeks went by and their happiness grew, until the night Buffy woke up in Spikes arms in a cold sweat startled awake by a dream. A confusing, frightening dream. There were vampires in her dream and they were in Sunnydale she could remember that much. There was a auburn haired girl who kept asking "Buffy, where are you?" And an englishman who acted worried and kept saying, "she has to be alive - another hasn't been called." And then the worst part of the dream a handsome dark haired man who kept saying "I love you, Buffy. I love you, Buffy" But she could sense that he had left her anyway, even though he professed his love for her over and over again. It was confusing and left her afraid of something she couldn't put her finger on. Spike held her and comforted her in his arms, kissing the top of her head and assuring her it was just a dream. It still frightened her < Who was Buffy? And why do I keep dreaming about her? > The dreams came about every other night. They got worse and worse. Spike finally made a decision, he had become afraid that there could be portents in the dreams and he needed to get her to Giles. So, one evening when he had calmed her down after a particular vivid dream. He picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number. "Hello." Came Giles voice over the line. "Watcher" He said softly. "Spike. Spike is that you?" Giles asked shock in his voice. "Yes. It's me. I can't explain over the phone. But Buffy is with me. She's okay. I'm bringing her home. We'll leave tomorrow and be there in a few days." "Buffy is okay?" Giles said excitedly. "She's fine. She's lost her memory, but I think it's trying to come back she's having dreams about the people in Sunnydale. I'm afraid the dreams may mean more." Spike explained. "She's lost her memory? Spike, where has she been?" "With me. I thought it was for the best. I'll call when we get to Sunnydale." Spike said as he hung up the phone. He went back to bed and lay beside Buffy. She looked troubled even in her sleep. He kissed her forehead gently, she woke up and pulled him closer, running her fingers through his hair, kissing him passionately. Later, Spike smiled down at her sleeping next to him, he would miss this - more then anything in the world. He looked down at the ring on his finger and sighed. ******************************************************************************* Honesty and Heartbreak "Why are we going back to Sunnydale?" Buffy asked as she packed her bag. "We have too. I think there is someone there who can help with your dreams." Spike answered as he packed his things. "I wish someone could help, they seem to be getting worse." She sighed. "I know, Luv. I want to help you, you do know that no matter what happens - I love you." He told her pulling her close. "I know you do. You sound worried, is there something I should know?" She asked concern in her voice. "No, pet. Let's get on the road." He treasured these last few days with her, because he knew his world was going to come crashing down around him as soon as he took her Giles. On their last day together he had held her so tightly in the bed that he had scared her. "William, you act like this is the last time you'll ever be with me. Are you sure you are alright?" "I'm fine. I just love you so much." "I love you, too. Don't worry." She had told him tenderly. They arrived in Sunnydale and Spike made the call. He and Buffy drove to the library to meet Giles and the others. He stopped the car outside and pulled Buffy to him, kissing her with an intensity she had never felt before. She broke off the kiss to take a deep breath. "Let's get this over with." She told him as they got out of the car. Spike took Buffy's hand and led her into the library. When they entered Giles practically ran across the room. He took Buffy into a big hug, soon Willow and Xander joined him. "Buffy, we've missed you." Willow said happily. Buffy looked at her, then looked back at Spike. "William these are the people from my dreams. Except the dark haired man. Who are you? And why are you calling me Buffy?" Angel chose then to step out of the shadows. Buffy had to catch her breath when she saw him. Flashes of her past came to her "You're him. The man in my dreams." She turned pale and said one more word "Angel." before fainting. "What have you done to her?" Xander asked angrily. "She hit her head that night in the cemetary. She came to with amnesia. I took that opportunity to take her away to safety. I wanted her to have a normal life for a change." Spike explained bitterly as he knelt beside Buffy. "You took advantage of the situation." Giles spoke up. "It was for her, whether you believe me or not. And she has been happy. Ask her." Spike spoke defensively. Willow noticed the wedding band on Buffy's hand as she knelt beside Spike. She then looked at Spike's hand and noticed his ring. "Does this mean, what I think it does?" She asked him softly, pointing to the ring. "We aren't really married. But she believes we are. We are William and Anne Pennington. Happily married." He explained as he ran his hand over Buffy's cheek. Buffy stirred then opened her eyes widely. She sat up "Willow." She said with a smile. "Yes, it's me. You remember?" Willow asked smiling at her best friend. "Yes, I remember. Giles, Xander, you and Angel. I remember everything. It's good to be back." She said happily. She then turned to Spike "I remember everything, Spike. How could you do this to me? She didn't sound happy now. Spike looked at her griefstricken, he knew this was what was going to happen, but he hadn't expected it to hurt this bad. "An...Buffy, I really wanted to save you. I was afraid of your getting hurt slaying. I took an opportunity, I made a judgement call. A bad judgement call." He tried to explain. Buffy looked at him coldly. She stood up, took off her wedding ring and placed it in the palm of his hand. Turning she said "I need to be alone." She walked out of the library tears streaming down her face. "I cannot believe you hurt her like this." Xander exclaimed. "I must agree with Xander on this. Spike you've acted irrationally and deplorable." Giles commented. Willow looked confused "I'll go after her." She started for the door. Angel had been quiet, but now he spoke. "No, Willow. I'll go." Spike's anger rose, "Sure, you'll go. You're just what she needs." Angel stepped forward and grabbed the front of Spike's shirt. "I'm doing you a favor. Everyone else in this room wants to kill you. I think I'm the only one who honestly understands why you did what you did. You love her. You love her so much it hurts, you can't fathom the world without her in it. So you decided to take her out of harms way. See, Spike, I understand. I know how you feel." Angel let go of Spike and went to follow Buffy. Spike stared after him, but let him go. Angel caught up with Buffy down the street from the school. "Hey, slow down." "I said I wanted to be alone." She stopped walking and looked up at him. "Well, you've always accused me of not listening to you." Angel took a hesitant step forward, he cautiously put his arms around her pulling her against his chest. Buffy didn't argue, she leaned against him and let the tears flow. "It's okay. It's gonna be okay." He whispered. "I can't believe he did this. When I was Anne, he told me he loved me. He made me believe it, that he cared. He even bought me that ring. He took care of me. And now it's all a lie." "Buffy, I can't believe I'm saying this, but Spike does love you. He's always had a twisted way of showing it, but he does care. He genuinely thought that he was doing what was best for you. He does love you. The question now, is how do you feel about him?" Angel lifted her chin and looked down into those hazel eyes. "Do you love him?" Several minutes passed, "Do you love him?" Angel repeated the question. "I don't know. I really don't know." Buffy answered honestly. Angel pulled her into a tight hug. "Buffy, I love you. I always will. But we know it's impossible. I don't want to be part of the reason that you don't move on, obviously when you had no memory of me, you did love him. You were happy. I'm not saying run inside the library and pull him in your arms and put that ring back on your finger. I am saying don't throw away a chance, a chance at happiness. Take it slow, but don't throw it away, out of anger." Angel spoke with a heavy sigh. "But...but all the deception, Angel. How can I forgive that?" She asked him green eyes shining with new tears. "Buffy, did you lie to me?" He asked harshly. "What?" She asked confused. "You said you forgave me for all I did as Angelus. Did you lie to me?" His dark eyes looked into the very deepest part of her. "No, I didn't lie." She finally squeaked out. "Alright then, if you can forgive my sins that were committed in the name of Angelus. You can forgive Spike's sins committed in the name of love." Angel let go of her, taking her hand he led her back to the library. ***************************************************************** A Brighter Future Spike sat at the large table in the library. He was playing with the ring on his finger, staring absently at the one lying on the table. He looked up sharply when Buffy entered the room, her hand still in Angel's. Anger flared through him, but he kept his mouth shut, waiting for her to speak. Willow hugged Buffy. "I'm sorry, Buffy. It will all work out." "I know Will. Thanks. I've got a few things to straighten out with William...er...Spike here. I love you guys, but I need to be alone with him. I promise to see you all tomorrow, I've got to see my Mom, too. Giles, I will be here to train tomorrow afternoon. I need to get my life back." "Your Mother is out of town, we didn't tell her you were back yet. Wanted to make sure it was all okay first." Xander explained. "Good, I can't face her right now. Could everyone please leave us alone now." She asked softly. "Of Course." "Sure" "Are you sure?" "I'm sure, Xan." Angel turned to her and smiled. "Oh, and thanks, Angel" She told him returning the smile. Letting go of his hand she turned to face Spike. Within in minutes they were left alone in the Library. Spike looked up at Buffy. She sat down across from him. "You have some explaining to do, Mister." She said seriously. "Well, not much to explain.I think I'll be on my way. You have your old life back now." He stood up and pushed the chair under the table. "So, you aren't even going to try?" She asked him. He looked at his feet. She continued "I mean that little to you?" He looked up suddenly. "You know you mean everything to me. I handled this badly, I know that. But I just thought it would keep you safe." Buffy stood up she gently wrapped her arms around him, he hesitantly accepted the embrace. "I know you love me. I can tell by the way you've taken care of me. But you did handle it badly. We've got a lot to think about. But I'm not ready to just walk away from you." He laughed softly "You mean it?" She looked up at him "Yes, I mean it. But it's going to go slow. Very slow." She told him as she picked up her ring off the table. She put it in her pocket and smiled "I might need this on down the road." Buffy took his hand in hers, Spike's smile lit up the whole library. It was the end of William and Anne - but the beginning of Buffy and Spike. The End